i feel bullied.
extremely bullied.
by alot of diff people
i cant explain that feeling..
and maybe it does not constitute bullying..
but thats wat i feel.

my bobo and chacha nv bullied me
i miss them

i dunnoe when i became sucha wuss.
i prefer myself b4.

pple are mean.
they take advantage of u.
i trust too easily and give too many benefits of the doubt
and the funny thing is i always thought myself as the opposite
but right now.. being bullied proves otherwise.

i changed myself cuz of u u and u.
u said i shld be less prissy
u said i shld be nicer
u said i shld be less trusting
u said i shld put in more effort with my frens.
u said i need to be more tactful and less blunt.
u said i shld spend more time at home
u said i shld study harder
u said i shld not be so laidback
well.. guess wat.. BACK AT ALL OF U.

i cant even sae im done being wat everyone wans me to be and start being myself
cuz i forgot wat myself was.

im just gonna curl up in my room and hibernate.
maybe meditating will help self actualization
for now.. studying for my 3 test and the upcoming exams shld make a good enuff excuse to hermitify myself.
social isolation is as much an excuse as it is a very welcomed escape.
i dunwan to be me right now.
but i dunnoe wat i wanna be.

u noe.. i need to grow up.
and be less wussy.
i whine alot. ALOT
and this is toned down whining.
im never happy w my choices that is one thing ure right about.
there is never a good choice when it comes to my decisions.
its always half empty to me.
why like that.

and right now..
with wats happening.
its more like totally empty.
im at the end.
and theres no one there.

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